Tag: Novel
- Carving Out a Plot – Okay so. Maybe it’s just me. I get a brilliant idea, and what I think is a great plot and then I sit down to actually plan, to actually write. And I slam into a brick wall. “Well, how is that going to work?” “How am I going to get to that part?” “Who the heck is going to actually want to read this?” I get stuck, and I can’t move.
- Naming Characters – Yes, I have name generators. I USE them all the time. But have you ever struggled to find the PERFECT name? Name generators are great, but they are limited. What if they don’t hit the right mood for a character? Naming a character is like naming a child. The name is there, in print, forever. It’s a huge, scary decision! (Yes, I’m overdramatic.)
- The semi-crippling anxiety of making something good – I’m a writer because I love to write. It’s my favorite thing to do, and I want nothing more than to do that all the time. But I want to put out a quality product because I want people to enjoy what I put out there. And so that’s what I worry about. Will people like this? Is this a pointless exercise? Am I any good?
How finishing a novel feels:
How realizing this means revision comes next feels:
Finished my third complete novel tonight. I really should get to revising them, shouldn’t I?
I guess I’ve been a little MIA the past few weeks. Between getting papers graded for work and participating in National Novel Writing Month, I feel like I haven’t had any time to myself!
If you don’t know what National Novel Writing Month is, I highly recommend you look into it. Writing a novel in a month is insanity. The good kind of insanity. In fact, the only novels I have ever finished were NaNoWriMo projects (this makes me a VERY BAD AUTHOR).
This year’s NaNoWriMo has been the craziest of them all. Real life has decided to be a thing this year. I am actually being a social human being (what!)! Plus there’s the whole work thing, which is taking up more of my time this year than it has in the past.
The craziest thing though is that I completely changed what I was going to write on the very first day. Originally, in my head, it was going to be a spin on popular fairy tales. I spent all of October planning and researching and getting ready (I am a planner).
But on November 1, I woke up completely inspired to start working on a novel I had scrapped long ago. I had some of it written, and about half an outline done, and I set to work on it. Scrapped all of my plans from the first novel and went with it. And I haven’t looked back since.
It’s not perfect, but I am enjoying it. And NaNoWriMo is all about getting the words on the page, right? I can make it better later.
There have probably been thousands or millions of blogs written about writer’s block. I hate being one of those people who adds to it, but I can’t help it. I’m so frustrated. I spend weeks planning a new story, and I start writing… And it all falls apart. This is the second time it has happened in the past few months.
I know I shouldn’t push it. I don’t want to push it. When I write, I want it to be something I’m proud of. But I have so many ideas in my head that I want to get out on paper. And I want to publish books. Plural. But how can I do it when I’m stuck?
Lately, I haven’t been able to find any time to write. And when I do think about it, my brain gets overwhelmed and crazy about all of the other things that I need to do in my life. I can’t even bring myself to finish editing the novel I actually have done.
How am I going to be a writer if I can’t get anything out onto paper? It’s just so completely frustrating. What do I do?
It’s only taken a couple of years, but I finally, FINALLY, convinced one of my friends to beta read my first novel. She read it in a night (which, I mean, I don’t write super in-depth stuff, no surprise), and she kept on texting me about how much she loved it, how great it was (not to brag or anything).
And I trust her. She’s one of my best friends, and I really trust her.
This morning, she sent me her notes. I read them first thing when I woke up. And I felt… angry.
- Your main character needs some more obvious flaws.
She has flaws! Are you not reading? Her shyness? Her anxiety? ARE YOU NOT READING?
- This part makes no sense.
Well, of course it makes sense! You read it in a night. Maybe you read it too fast.
My initial instinct was to be angry with her. Shouldn’t she think my story is perfect?
No. Of course not. And after a few deep breaths (and maybe a mile of running at the gym), I started thinking sensibly. She told me how much she liked it. Her notes were an attempt to make it better. So that when and if I publish it. It’s a GOOD book.
I might not use all of her ideas. But some? Some make sense. And maybe I am upset that my book isn’t perfect, but. I’m coming around. I can fix it.
Of course, that means revisions. (Ugh)
And what am I going to do when I publish it and more reviews start streaming in from anonymous strangers?
When I started this site, I told myself that I was going to be active. I want to meet and interact with other authors. And I want to get advice for my own stuff. I was going to be so good about it. It was going to be great.
Then real life happened.
It’s the end of the school year for my students. In fact, they start their final tomorrow. In an ordinary year, this would be hectic anyway, what with final grades and students needing to study and the fact that our school has NO AC (humidity and I are NOT friends).
BUT. I am about to lose this job. My position is victim to the many budget cuts that teachers face. Because of this, I am about to lose my health insurance, which is a VERY scary thought.
On top of that, I have gotten a zillion job interviews. This is a good thing. I KNOW it is. I know that the more interviews I go on, the more chance I have of landing a job. Unfortunately, interviews take a lot out of someone. Selling yourself, being your best, dealing with the nerves, is taxing. Especially when they make you teach in front of a group of real live students.
I have had 8 interviews in 2 weeks. And more before that. I am tired. I have a perpetual stomach ache. I keep losing my train of thought. Worst of all, I burst into tears in front of one of my classes today. For no reason. It’s been so hard.
I just want a job. I want this to be over. I want the anxiety to go away. I want to focus on other things.
But until then, I might be a little silent for a while.
There are always stories in my head. In fact, there are often more stories than I can keep track of most of the time. I’ve loved writing since I was a little kid with my nose stuck in my first chapter book. I’ve always written for fun, and I love it.
Unfortunately, I also love my day job. I’m a teacher, and as crazy and hectic as it can be, I love it. I love the kids and the struggles and the chaos. I love being that completely nerdy teacher that my students roll their eyes about.
But here is the problem. Teaching and writing don’t always mix. Even when I come home, my work isn’t done. There’s work to grade, emails to respond to, lessons to plan, and the general worry hanging over my head that I’ve messed up my students for life. It’s stressful.
The worst part about it all is that after a full 8+ hour day of teaching, I can’t do anything else. Words don’t want to come, and I certainly don’t want to sit up at a computer for hours and write a story. Even now, I am forcing myself to sit here and write this. My eyes are heavy and painful. I’m easily annoyed and brought to tears at the drop of a hat.
SO VERY TIRED.
And yet, there’s this story in my head, clamoring to get out. It’s been there for days, weeks, months. The only work I’ve been able to do on it is choose two names that I like to name my female protagonist. Because as exciting as it all is (and starting a new novel is one of my favorite things in the world), all’s I want to do is sleep until I don’t feel so uncomfortable anymore.
But look… so shiny…
